6.08.2005
Mood of the Moment: "All the boys in every girlie magazine can't make me feel any less alone..."
Music of the Moment: A couple of Dash songs that have importance to me...
Ok, so, today...pretty much I have been bored. I do know this much though...I miss sleep...I don't remember the exact day that we went our seperate ways...but somewhere along the line sleep and I kinda lost touch. this whole not getting to sleep until four, and waking up before eight thing isn't working for me. I mean, it is ok once or twice....or if I have a reason to stay up late and get up early...but i don't ...I mean...nobody that I know cares to do anything that late at night...and most of my friends sleep until like noon, at least...the only people that dont would never think to call me and do anything in the mornings, so I really have no reason why I shouldn't get at least a good 6 hours of sleep...possibly even the recommended 8...but no! It is like my eyelids refuse to stay closed for more than 2-3 hours at a time...confound it! But ah well...
ok, so today I woke up to my sister puking...that was lovely. Then I went with my grandmother to get her haircut and get her medicines. Oh, for my grandmother it was like "embarass DeAnna day" today...She was talking to her hairstylist, and was talking about my brother playing on the big keyboard I have, and how I used to play on it when I was younger, and I interjected with the fact that I was never good at it....in fact I sucked...because I suck at anything musical...and my grandmother was like "weren't you taking guitar lessons? How did you do at that?" and I was like "I tried a couple of different people teaching me, but my fingers hate me and rebel..." and my Grandmother was like "what was that boys name that was teaching you?" and I was like "Mark?" and she was like, "no the other one"..."Brian?"...and she was like "yea...that is it..." and I was cool with this...and then the lady was like "Brian Beck?".....crap...so I was just like "yea"...and she proceededto be all like "yea, I know him..." yada yada...she apparently wants to hear him play bagpipes...and I just used the oppurtunity to show off my necklace...My grandmother has a tendency to run her mouth a lot though...and I am positive that my face was quite red by the time I left...grr...
So yea, then we went to get her medicines...and then I came home and ended up going out with Jennifer to Wal-Mart, the mall, and Barnes & Nobles...muy fun it was...I bought a shirt that says "everybody loves Irish girls" hehe me gusta...oh, and Jennifer got this shirt that I absolutely love, but I just am NOT brave enough to wear it...b/c I know that I could never pull it off...le sigh...love to be skinny I would...but I am not, so deal with it I shall.
On my way home i realized that the Paragon road sign is down...oh my cow I wanted it! I dont know why I have this odd fascination for that sign...and I've always been like, if I was to steal a sign, then it would most likely be that one...and we drove past it...and it was down!!!Jennifer offered to go back and get it...but I was like...nah....I may just have to give either Jason A. or Dustin a call tomorrow though, since both of them have trucks...hehe...
Yesterday I did not blog simply because I was tired of writing, for my other journal got like four pages front and back yesterday,plus I didn't have much time because I spent most of the day either with Kody or at my grandmother's house helping MeMaw and PawPaw...I love Kody...he is the biggest doll baby ever! Hehe...I walk in the door and he is all like "Mommy!!!" and wants me to hold him or play with some new toy, or read him a book...like today I went over there to give Corol her medicines...because I picked them up for her when we were out...and Tiffany was dropping off Kody...but he didn't want to get down and play, and he didn't want carol to hold him, and he's try to hit her if she got near him...it was quite obvious that he was quite tired. So I walked in ane he was smiling and waving at me and tiffany asked if he wanted me to hold him...and then she could go and I could stay with him and he was like "uhhh huh!"...So I took him and we rocked back and forth a bit, and I started to sing the mockingbird song to him and pat him on the back...and I got him to go to sleep, because he wouldn't let me sit him down otherwise...hehe...he is my sweetheart....although I dont think tiffany likes the idea of him calling me mommy....I have tried to get him not to...and he is getting better about trying to call me by my actual name....but most of the time it is still mommy....though it is quite flattering... hehe..children are so fun and adorable...if i get this attached to those that aren't even related...I can just imagine what it would be like to have my own...provided I ever get the chance...which I doubt. Ah well...
My Dad is starting his like 6th lecture of the night right now...which means that I am about to get off now....and go to bed....because I am tired...because I have had no sleep...but hopefully tonight will be different....or at least I can hope...goodnight...
Much Love,
DeAnna
There's always some reason
To feel not good enough
And it's hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction
Oh beautiful release
Memory seeps from my veins
Let me be empty
And weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight...
Music of the Moment: A couple of Dash songs that have importance to me...
Ok, so, today...pretty much I have been bored. I do know this much though...I miss sleep...I don't remember the exact day that we went our seperate ways...but somewhere along the line sleep and I kinda lost touch. this whole not getting to sleep until four, and waking up before eight thing isn't working for me. I mean, it is ok once or twice....or if I have a reason to stay up late and get up early...but i don't ...I mean...nobody that I know cares to do anything that late at night...and most of my friends sleep until like noon, at least...the only people that dont would never think to call me and do anything in the mornings, so I really have no reason why I shouldn't get at least a good 6 hours of sleep...possibly even the recommended 8...but no! It is like my eyelids refuse to stay closed for more than 2-3 hours at a time...confound it! But ah well...
ok, so today I woke up to my sister puking...that was lovely. Then I went with my grandmother to get her haircut and get her medicines. Oh, for my grandmother it was like "embarass DeAnna day" today...She was talking to her hairstylist, and was talking about my brother playing on the big keyboard I have, and how I used to play on it when I was younger, and I interjected with the fact that I was never good at it....in fact I sucked...because I suck at anything musical...and my grandmother was like "weren't you taking guitar lessons? How did you do at that?" and I was like "I tried a couple of different people teaching me, but my fingers hate me and rebel..." and my Grandmother was like "what was that boys name that was teaching you?" and I was like "Mark?" and she was like, "no the other one"..."Brian?"...and she was like "yea...that is it..." and I was cool with this...and then the lady was like "Brian Beck?".....crap...so I was just like "yea"...and she proceededto be all like "yea, I know him..." yada yada...she apparently wants to hear him play bagpipes...and I just used the oppurtunity to show off my necklace...My grandmother has a tendency to run her mouth a lot though...and I am positive that my face was quite red by the time I left...grr...
So yea, then we went to get her medicines...and then I came home and ended up going out with Jennifer to Wal-Mart, the mall, and Barnes & Nobles...muy fun it was...I bought a shirt that says "everybody loves Irish girls" hehe me gusta...oh, and Jennifer got this shirt that I absolutely love, but I just am NOT brave enough to wear it...b/c I know that I could never pull it off...le sigh...love to be skinny I would...but I am not, so deal with it I shall.
On my way home i realized that the Paragon road sign is down...oh my cow I wanted it! I dont know why I have this odd fascination for that sign...and I've always been like, if I was to steal a sign, then it would most likely be that one...and we drove past it...and it was down!!!Jennifer offered to go back and get it...but I was like...nah....I may just have to give either Jason A. or Dustin a call tomorrow though, since both of them have trucks...hehe...
Yesterday I did not blog simply because I was tired of writing, for my other journal got like four pages front and back yesterday,plus I didn't have much time because I spent most of the day either with Kody or at my grandmother's house helping MeMaw and PawPaw...I love Kody...he is the biggest doll baby ever! Hehe...I walk in the door and he is all like "Mommy!!!" and wants me to hold him or play with some new toy, or read him a book...like today I went over there to give Corol her medicines...because I picked them up for her when we were out...and Tiffany was dropping off Kody...but he didn't want to get down and play, and he didn't want carol to hold him, and he's try to hit her if she got near him...it was quite obvious that he was quite tired. So I walked in ane he was smiling and waving at me and tiffany asked if he wanted me to hold him...and then she could go and I could stay with him and he was like "uhhh huh!"...So I took him and we rocked back and forth a bit, and I started to sing the mockingbird song to him and pat him on the back...and I got him to go to sleep, because he wouldn't let me sit him down otherwise...hehe...he is my sweetheart....although I dont think tiffany likes the idea of him calling me mommy....I have tried to get him not to...and he is getting better about trying to call me by my actual name....but most of the time it is still mommy....though it is quite flattering... hehe..children are so fun and adorable...if i get this attached to those that aren't even related...I can just imagine what it would be like to have my own...provided I ever get the chance...which I doubt. Ah well...
My Dad is starting his like 6th lecture of the night right now...which means that I am about to get off now....and go to bed....because I am tired...because I have had no sleep...but hopefully tonight will be different....or at least I can hope...goodnight...
Much Love,
DeAnna
There's always some reason
To feel not good enough
And it's hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction
Oh beautiful release
Memory seeps from my veins
Let me be empty
And weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight...
# posted by DeAnna : 1:34 AM
